Day 28, and a little fun from the world of pirating in the 41st Century, not long before his encounter with a certain time-traveller we all know and love.  This is a glimpse at Rowlandos, the Pirate-Emperor (and a character based on my friend Row), as well as the star of his own novel when it’s finished!


“What do you think?”

The pirates all looked at Rowlandos like he was insane.

Truth be told, he was, although his tactical genius and cruel ruthless side outweighed the madness a great deal.  His chrome dreadlocks dangled at his back, tied with neutralised wire.  He was topless, a phase he had been going through recently.

Hevskii shook her head, rubbing the bridge of her nose with her fingertips.

Toddorov was on the floor crying, holding his stomach with tears streaming out of his eyes.

Heidi Gabs was looking at him with both love and hate, trying not to feel sick as she took in the picture he was holding up beside him.

Gattus and Gurbelldunf, recently joined, keeled over, passing out.

Chainsaw and Manko covered their eyes, trying to forget it existed.


“Row,” Heidi started to say, “It’s very…”


Rowlandos nodded, satisfied.

The self-portrait of himself was a blurred mish-mash of colours that had no real approximation of what he looked like other than a splodge of green where his face should be, and silvery threads coming off it.  The resemblance ended there.

“It looks like a child painted it,” Hevskii groaned.

Toddorov laughed even harder, and Manko had to help him to his feet.  He was still laughing when Rowlandos spun the painting horizontal and smashed it over Toddorov’s head, the idiot being wedged to his elbows, trapped by the frame and canvas.

The entire room erupted into cheers and laughs as Rowlandos marched out in a huff, grumbling about “un-artistic bastard heathens.”

28 - Self-Portrait  spanishinn_papermirror

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